Month: March 1996

I saw the Deep Space Nine episode where Jadzia-Dax meets the current host of the symbiont who’s former host was the wife of one of her symbiont’s prior hosts.  This is the best Deep Space Nine episode I’ve seen so far, it revives so many concepts I thought I’d given up.  Jadzia and Lenara’s kiss is the most perfect romantic scene I’ve ever seen on television (and perhaps second only to the butterfly scene in Arau’s “A walk in the clouds”).  And I believe in soul-mates again, but do we really need a literalization of the transmigration to believe in an ever-lasting love?  Even this quaalification won’t diminish my new-found naivete.  I believe.

Every so often I find myself feeling as if I’ve lost something.  I begin to search my pockets, checking on my keys, my wallet and the tokens I carry with me.  I’ve not lost anything over the past few days (except my spectacles, which I kept by my bed yesterday and can’t find today, I suspect I’ve been sleep-walking, something I’ve never done before), in fact I’ve carried things with me I shouldn’t have.  This is a sense of loss, but I can’t say what I’m to make of it, I may have partial explanations that rest on received conceptions of the self, but nothing firm.  Meanwhile I continue to search my pockets every so often.  It isn’t a part of me that’s missing, but an appendage I use to function in the world.